365 Days Later (and a very, very exciting new toy for me!)

One year ago today Mr. Bug and I, along with a smallish horde of indulgent friends, rose early to finish the final primping, organizing, cleaning and other hair-brained activities necessary to host a backyard wedding. A three-backyard wedding, as two neighbors were kind enough to share their backyards with us. I’d kept myself relatively free of wedding-planning psychosis, although our budget had ballooned and there is certainly some sort of strange wedding-frenzy that takes hold and makes reasonable people able to discern the most expensive cardstock at a glance and at the same time fills one with a certainty that the decision to go with the flimsy cardstock obviously made by child labor out of not-eco-friendly 1,000 year old redwoods will cause the marriage to end disaster.

With a year’s time to give me some perspective, here’s my tips for hosting a garden wedding.

the rehearsal dinner

don’t forget your clipboard 001

check that the maid of honor’s footwear
coordinates with the mulch

Utilize child labor to keep
the hound under control

Assign a friend to ensure your mother
remains amused for the duration of the rehearsal dinner.
(Note the line of obedient ducklings following me in the background…)

Make sure at least one friend NOT in the
wedding party is present in order
to ensure constant beverage service.

Do not allow anyone to eat until
they have reviewed your 18 page schedule.
Encourage questions, but don’t feel
you need to answer the impertinent ones.
Especially from smirking husbands-to-be.

The giving of gifts is an important part of the rehearsal dinner.
A fancy-pants poker set is a classy choice.

Alternately, bass fishing books from the used book store will do.

Try to refrain from staying up all night for one last hurrah.


Be sure to take time to snuggle with your intended.
Awesome picture of me, isn’t it? 012

The day of the wedding

{getting ready}

Enlist friends. Preferably ones with sewing skills.

If you are part of the man-side, impersonate the ratpack in someone’s basement.
Do not remove coats, even if it’s steaming hot.

If you try a last-minute run-for-it,
watch out for paparazzi with giant zoom lenses.

{the ceremony}

Force your most easy going girlfriend
to team up with the basset hound.
(the man is not a groomsman, he’s my very
obliging neighbor/wedding host who
made sure the girls didn’t fall over in their heels)

Talk your soon to be husband into
going for the slimmest cut
custom-made suit available.
Do not attempt to make it yourself.

Talk through the gender politics of wearing a veil
and who will lift it away from your face until all
your friends get a glazed look even hearing the word ‘veil’

It’s true. You’ll probably be grinning like
an idiot in all the pictures, which will make
your double chin disappear and give you
a general good-picture day. It’s some sort
of wedding magic that unfortunately
I have been unable to
replicate for blog-photo-sessions.

{the reception}

Instead of renting furniture,
just drag it out of your house.
Pillage your neighbor’s white picket fence
for good sign-making materials. Force mother
into garage the day before the weekend to
paint said signs. If she doesn’t do it
perfectly, make her do it again.
Do not allow her restroom breaks or water.

Make sure all of your friends wear coordinating colors.
Send them photos from the garden so they do not
pick shades of red that clash with the roses.
Note the absence of children at the reception.
This can be achieved by including the following wording on the RSVP:
Circle number of attendees
1 or 2 Adults
1 or 2 Dogs
Due to allergies, Cats not permitted.

Utilize country-inspired décor items
to hold the supplies for the open bar.

Since you’re having an open bar, you’ll
need a security detail.

Engage the gay mafia for the night.

If you are only providing beer and wine,
expect that some will sneak in a bit of the harder stuff.
022 copy

Also anticipate that some of your guests will be
unable to resist filling up 2 glasses
full of delicious two-buck-chuck at once.
021 copy

STAY WITH YOUR NEW HUSBAND!! Do not be separated.
This ensures lots of good pictures of
the two of you together.
In the same vein, it might be nice
to sit by your mom at least once.
Otherwise you will end up owing
her for the rest of your life for
not having any wedding day
photos of the two of you together.

Force the wedding party to assume all
responsibility for your unruly hound for the entire reception.

To save money, only serve food that can be
eaten with one’s fingers.
General rule of thumb for ordering cupcakes:
3 cupcakes per guest.
Two extra per dog.

Ask your friends to take lots of pictures
of the crowd and send them to you
as soon as possible.
Seriously, these were the best pictures,
because everything went by in a blur for us.
027 copy

When the latex gloves come out,
it’s probably time to leave.

When the party crashers show up, definitely leave!
030 copy

Off we go!

Happy anniversary, papabear!

{too much for you platypis?}

As a palette cleanser for my completely off-topic post… check out what I got this weekend! It wasn’t exactly an anniversary gift, perhaps more of a anniversary celebratory gift. I was complicit in its purchase.

Look at this awesomeness – it opens all the way up! It’s SUPER easy to thread! On it’s first night home with us I finished a TON of scarves I’ve had in my to-do pile and I finished a dress! Yay! A serger!

It’s a H Class 200S by Husqvarna Viking, the most basic model they offer. It does 2, 3 and 4 thread serging and has some features I love! You’ll be seeing lots more of it, I’m sure!

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  • rubyslypprz
    June 21, 2011

    Kudos to both of you—somehow you managed a completely unique, personal, and best of all, FUN wedding celebration! Your descriptions have brightened up my entire day. Hope you can "serge ahead" with the same vivacious gusto!

  • flyskim
    June 20, 2011

    Congratulations on your first year! Your wedding looks like it was a blast.

  • LAP
    June 20, 2011

    Happy Anniversary Patty & Dan!

  • Corrine
    June 20, 2011

    Thanks for sharing your awesome wedding events. You look absolutely gorgeous and happy as a clam! The hound, of course, appears downright regal. As all Basset owners know they are always the center of an event. Congrats on your new serger. It sounds like it already had a good workout. A good serger is a girls best friend.

  • Casey
    June 20, 2011

    Happy Anniversary, Patty! :) Love the new serger too–it looks so nice and shiny (as only a new serger can. haha!). Can't wait to see what new amazingness you whip up!

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